Today marks the start of an all new project for Jania and I. Last year, our portfolio project did not turn out the way we had hoped it would. To be honest, neither of us was proud of our film introduction. Our final product was sloppy and full of mistakes, and I catch myself cringing whenever I think about other people seeing it. But, this year, we are determined to redeem ourselves by creating a short film that we can stand beside with pride.
We're purposefully going a totally different route from the lighthearted, cutesy opening that we did last year, because we want to distance ourself from that idea and do something completely new. The only similarity is that, like last year, the topic for our new short film is quite personal to both Jania and I. Our concept this year centers around mental illness, specifically depression, and how it feels to be suicidal. Both Jania and I have our own experiences with mental illness, which is why this film means a lot to us. What I really want to do is shine a light on the fact that living with severe mental illness means being in a constant battle with one's own thoughts, while still having to carry on through day to day life as though nothing is wrong. It's a burden that many people carry, but few speak out about.
The consistently negative representation of mentally ill people in mainstream media has resulted in a common narrative in which the mentally ill are treated as unstable, crazy, and even dangerous individuals. However, the reality is that the majority of people with a mental illness lead normal, everyday lives and show no signs of their condition to the outside world. I want to find a way to effectively convey this in our film, because I'm tired of seeing stories where mental illness is demonized and portrayed as something to be feared.
With that said, I'm excited to start my research and get a better understanding of what I need to do in order to meet my own standards for this film's production. It's going to be a lot of work, but I feel far more prepared this time around.
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